"Those wacky vampires, that's why I love them, they just keep ya guessing."
"Marie Antoinette cared about them, she let them have cake." Cordelia
"Things used to be pretty simple, 100 years, just hanging out, feeling guilty, I honed on my brooding skills." Angel
"There are books on computers? I thought the point of computers was to replace books." Cordelia
"Does rest in peace have any sanctity to you people, oh, I forgot, you're not people." Buffy
"There can be only one." Buffy
"Hello and welcome to planet pocket protector." Buffy
"Kendra, you slay, I'm going to Disneyland." Buffy
Buffy: "Speak English, not like what they speak in ah..."
Giles: "England."
"I don't think anyone should have to do anything educational in school if they don't want to." Cordelia
"A lot of educators tell students, think of your principal as you pal, I say think of me as your judge, jury and executioner." Principal Snyder
"People underestimate the value of a good ramble." Buffy
"You're a special boy... with cabins and stuff." Willow
"I test well, which is cool, except that it leads to jobs." Oz
"My emotions give me power, they are total assets." Buffy
"The creature from the Blue Lagoon was Brooke Shields." Xander
"Why don't you get off your immortal ass and fight evil from once." Buffy
"I like this world, you've got dog racing, Manchester United, and you got people, billions of people walking around like Happy Meals with legs." Spike
"I'm a Slayer, not a postal worker." Buffy
"Without passion, we'd be truly dead." Angel
"I think boys are more interested in a girl who can talk." Willow
"Seize the moment, because tomorrow you might dead." Buffy
"I don't like vampires, I'm gonna take a stand and say they are not good." Xander
"Tact is just not saying true stuff, I'll pass." Cordelia
"Who died and made you Elvis?" Cordelia
"Testosterone is a great equalizer, it turns men into morons." Giles
"I'm sorry I'm unruffled by spiders, now if a bunch of Nazi's crawled all over my face..." Xander
"If there's something bad out there, we'll find, you slay, we'll party." Xander
"There are children everywhere, like locusts, crawling around mindlessly, bent on feeding and mating, destroying everything in site in their relentless pointless desire to exist." Principal Snyder
"Your brain isn't connected to your mouth." Buffy
Buffy: "Interesting lady, can we kill her?"
Giles: "The council might frown upon that."
"She didn't even care enough to cut off my head or set me on fire, is that too much to ask." Spike
Joyce: "He's crazy, he'll kill us."
Spike: "Not while I breath, well I don't actually breath..."
"You're not even a looser anymore, you're a shell of a looser." Buffy
"I may be loves bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it." Spike
"I'm Support gal." Buffy
Buffy:"Angle's a vampire, I thought you knew."
Cordelia: "Oh he's a vampire of course, but the cuddly kind, like a Care Bear with fangs."
"Raise your hand if ew" Buffy
"I love the smell of desperate librarian in the morning." Principal Snyder
"Prince of Night, I summon you, come fill me with your naughty evil." Willow
"Maybe next time that the world is getting sucked into hell, I won't be able to stop it because the anti-hell-sucking book isn't on the approved reading list." Buffy
"How do you know if someone's aura is dirty? Somebody comes by with a finger and writes 'wash me' on it." Buffy
"I have a research paper on Bosnia for tomorrow, but if the world's ending, I'm not gonna bother." Cordelia
"It's not that I don't trust you. Actually it is that I don't trust you." Angel
Angel: "You can't imagine the price for true evil."
Faith: "Yeah, well I hope evil takes Master Card."
"Demons after money, whatever happened to a still beating heart of a virgin. No one has any standards anymore." Giles
"I've got an unlife you know..." Spike
"Ice is cool, it's water, but it's not." Oz
Willow: "I eat danger for breakfast." Xander: "Oddly enough she panics in the face of breakfast food."
Giles: "What's that, a demon?" Buffy: "No, a prom dress."
"You have the emotional maturity of a blueberry scone." Giles
"The Hellmouth puts the 'special' in 'special occassion'" Oz
"Panic is a thing people can share in times of crisis." Willow
"What's the fun of becoming an immortal demon if you're not regular." The Mayor
"Oh trusty soda machine, I push you for root beer and you give me a coke." Willow
Wicked Faith: "I feel wicked stupid" "You're wicked gross." "Mayor gave me the poison, he said it was wicked painful."
"We don't knock during dark rituals?" The Mayor
"Men like sports, men watch the action movie, they eat of the beef and enjoy to look at the bosoms." Xander
Wesley: "You can't turn your back on the council." Buffy: "They're in England, I don't think they can tell which way my back is facing."
Xander: "Aren't you supposed to be drinking tea?" Giles: "Tea is soothing, I wish to be tense." Xander: "OK, but you're destroying a a perfectly good stereo type here."
Cordelia: "I personally don't think it's possible to come up with a crazier plan." Oz: "We attack the Mayor with hommus." Cordelia: "I stand corrected." Oz: "Just keeping things in perspective."
"You can trust some guys, really, I've read about them." Buffy
"Occasionally I'm callous and strange." Willow
"I have witnessed a millenium of treachery and oppression from the males of the species and I have nothing but contept for the whole libidinous lot of them!" Anya
"Oh gosh!" The Demon Mayor
"How do you get to be renowned, I mean, like, do you have to be nowned first?" Buffy
Girl: "Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your personal savior?" Buffy: "You know, I meant to and then I just got really busy."
Willow: "Oh, boyfriend! It's my on campus boyfriend." Buffy: "Oh no, I forgot to pick mine up, line's probably really long now too."
Xander: "You up for a little reconnaissance?" Buffy: "You mean where we all sculpt and paint and stuff?" Xander: "No, that was the Renaissance."
Xander: "Do we hug?" Oz: "I think we're too manly."
Buffy: "You run?" Giles: "And jump, and bend and occasionally frolic."
"Don't non college guys populate the non campus?" Buffy
Kathy: "Who left their gum here?" Buffy: "Gum gnome?"
"She irons her jeans, she's evil!" Buffy
Xander: "I don't get your crazy system." Giles: "My system, it's called the alphabet."
"Can we eat a doctor, so we can get a stethascope and hear my heart not beating." Harmony
"Giles has a tv, he's shallow like us." Xander
"Being a vampire sucks." Harmony
"I wasn't scared, I was in the spirit." Xander
"There's no problem that can't be solved by chocolate." Buffy
Frat Boy: "Had the earliest morality developed under the influence of beer, there would not be good or evil, there would be "kind of nice" or "pretty cool".
Xander: "I didn't know it was evil." Giles: "You knew it was beer."
"I got your number Id Boy." Willow
Willow: "There are men-better men, wherein the mind is stronger than the penis." Xander: "Nothing can defeat the penis."
"If he were ties and gagged and left in a cave where vampires frequent, it wouldn't really be like I killed him, really." Buffy
"You made me jealous of you academically." Willow
"Shouldn't she have a better rewards systems, you know, like a cookie or a toy surprise, like at the dentist." Buffy
Giles: "I'm down with the music." Buffy: "Yes, but it's your cutting edge 8-tracks that keep you ahead of the scene."
"People are kind of a planetary epidemic." Willow
"Any reaction is ok, except projectile vomiting." Willow
"If you hurt her I will beat you to death with a shovel. A vague disclaimer is nobody's friend." Willow
"Giles, he's gonna scold me!" Buffy
"I'm only 126" Spike
"I can't wait until mom gets the bill for these books, I hope it's a funny aneurism." Buffy
"Fortune favors the brave." Buffy
"All you care about is multiple orgasms." Anya
Xander: "I cut you off!" Buffy: "Did it hurt?"
"I'm the Slayer...the chosen one, she who hangs out in cemeteries." Buffy
"I'd hate to break it to you oh impotent one, but you not the big bad anymore, you're not even kind of naughty." Xander
Giles: "It's the end of the world." Buffy, Willow and Xander: "Again!?"
Xander: "Think of the happy, if we don't find what we're looking for, we're facing the apocalypse." Spike: "Really, you're not just saying that?"
"oh, as usual, dear!" Giles
"Sunnydale High, if these walls were still walls, the stories they could tell." Xander
"This thing take 'wicked' very seriously." Buffy
"No offense, but you do look wicked conspicuous." Buffy
Riley: "What are you." Buffy: "Capricorn on the cusp of Aquarius, you?"
Willow: "They're dealing with the crisis the only way we know how, After Shock Party." Buffy: "Ah, this from the dorm that brought us the 'Somebody Sneezed Party, and 'The Day That Ends in a Y Party'."
"What's this, sitting around watching the tele while there's evil afoot!" Spike
"We have to make this fast, I've got better things to do than kill." Buffy
"I've known corpses with a fresher smell, in fact, I've been one." Spike
"Your better demons will clean up after themselves." Xander
"And I'm supposed to just help you out of the evilness of my heart?" Spike
"I've really got to learn to just do the damage and get out. I'ts the stay and gloat that gets me every time." Ethan Rayne
"You're really strong, like Spiderman Strong." Riley Finn
"I haven't been a nerd for a very long time. Hello, dating a guitarist." Willow
"I told you, I said end of the world and you're like, poo poo, Southern California, poo poo." Buffy
"...mausoleums, big cereal boxes of death." Buffy
"Demons got some pretty hilarious ideas of fun." Xander
"You know, there is nothing more dangerous than a grad psych student." Buffy
"Ew, Mayor Meat, extra crispy." Xander
"I like pancakes 'cause they're stackable. Oh and waffles 'casue you can put things in the little holes if you want." Buffy
"Bloody humans." Demon Giles
"I was just thinking about the life of a pumkin. Grow up in the sun, happily intwinded with others, then someone comes along, cuts you open and rips your guts out." Buffy
"A blast will be had by all." Oz
Dawn: “What are you supposed to be?”
Anya: “An angel.”
Dawn: “Shouldn’t you have wings?”
Anya: “I’m a special kind of angel called Charlie, we don’t have wings, we just skate around with perfect hair and fight crime.”
“He was so much easier to talk to when he wanted to kill me.” Buffy
“Mist, cemetery, Halloween, should end well.” Giles
“Respect the cruller and tame the donut.” Xander
”I’ve got a theory, it could be bunnies.” Anya
Anya: “Will you still make me waffles when we’re married?”
Xander: “No, I’ll only make them for myself, but by California law, you will own half of them.”
“So Dawn’s in trouble, it must be Tuesday.” Buffy
”Don’t give me songs, give me something to sing about.” ? Buffy
”The pain that you fell only can healed by living.” Spike
“The hardest thing in this world is to live in it.” Dawn
"I've really got to learn to just do the damage and get out. It's the stay and gloat that gets me every time." Ethan Rayne
“I tried to kill my friends last week, my sister and guess how much they hate me? Zero, zero much.” Buffy
“He’s got that same look on his face, the one he had that time I highlighted his Babylon 5 novels.” Andrew
“What the hell is that creepy little thing doing in my yard? Did Willow put it in when I was dead, ‘cause if I’d known, I would have crawled out of the grave sooner.” Buffy
“Warren’s the boss, he’s Picard, you’re Deana Troy. Get used to it Betazoid.” Andrew
Tara: “We were able to decipher everything except these. It is written isn’t written in any language we could identify.”
Xander: “They’re Klingon love poems.”
“Oh hi, you didn’t by chance eat a couple of nerds did you?” Buffy
“Willy wanna bite can’t hurt me.” Xander
"Make fun (of the) ex-demon. I can just hear you in private, 'I dislike that Anya, she's newly human and strangely literal'." Anya
"Don't float the merchandise." Anya
"You can't stop Glory, you can't do anything with the information except publish it in the Everyone Thinks We're Insane Home Journal." Buffy
"You're Watchers. Without a Slayer you're pretty much just watching Masterpiece Theatre." Buffy
"If I wanted to fight, you could tell by the being dead already." Glory
"A trip to England sounds so exciting and exotic…unless you're English." Tara
"I thought English people were gentler than normal people." Tara
Anya: "Who ordered the Chicken's feet? The ones we have aren't moving at all."
Xander: "That's generally what happens when you cut them off the chicken."
Xander: "Maybe you could fight him."
Spike: "Yeah, I could do that, but I'm paralyzed with not caring much."
Buffy: "We're talking about two very powerful witches and a 1000 year old ex-demon."
Anya: "Willow's a demon?"
Tara: "Why doesn't Mr. Giles put them out of here?"
Xander: "Because if they deport him, they're not just destroying his career, they're condemning the man to a life of sausage, bangers and mash."
Buck up you! You kill the best! Kill, kill! Go you." Anya
"Angel's the Dark revenger, only not too dark. Happy dark." Cordy
"We just have some stuff to work through. That doesn't mean we rebound with the evil dead." Xander
Riley: "I take it you're not an Angel fan."
Xander: "Well it's not like I hate the guy you know, just the guts part."
"You cannot have my catnip. You have a catnip problem." Willow
"He's the deadest in Deadonia." Buffy
"Whatever happened to Latin? At least when it made no sense, the church apporved." Giles
"Warms the cockles of my not beating heart..." Spike
"Does anybody miss the mayor I just wanna be a big snake?" Xander
"Hello, paging Doctor Owe-Me-One." Spike
"It's an ancient sacred text, not a Magic 8-ball." Wesley
"A watcher scoffs at gravity." Xander's dream Giles
"Isn't vengence kind of, vengeful?" Dream Xander
"You know, I never told you how glad I was that you got eaten by a snake." Dream Xander
"World domination, is that good?" Dream buffy
"I wear the cheese, it does not wear me." The Cheese Man
"Sometimes I sort of forget that he's gone, it's like, where's Riley, oh wait he's in the Central Republic of Where in the Hell." Xander
Willow: “Well, you know what they say, the bigger they are…”
Anya: “…the faster they stamp you into nothing.”
“A crazy hell god, and the fun just keeps leaving.” Xander
“Never send a minion to do a god’s work.” Glory
“I wasn’t lurking. I was standing about. It’s a whole different vibe.” Spike
“Jet lag from hell has got to be, you know, jet lag from hell.” Anya
“Evil things have plans, they have things to do.” Anya
“It’s hard to get a good night’s death around here.” Spike
“You know what they say, those who fail history are doomed to repeat it in summer school.” Buffy
“So we meet at last Mr. Drippy.” Buffy to a leaky pipe
“It’s not like it’s the end of the world, which is too bad because that’s something I’m really good at.” Buffy
“You’ll find that as you get older, you lose patience with throwing up.” Giles
“Action figures fully deployed.” Jonathan
“I saw the fury and that way looked like spooky carnival death.” Xander
“I think there’s a clog eating monster under the bed. It’s really those lesser known monsters that make living in Sunnydale so hard.” Willow
“I used to punish people like this when I was a demon, I used to make them check spreadsheets for all eternity.” Anya
“I was being patient, but it took too long.” Anya
“Sorry, I questioned you Spike, you know I admire your brains almost as much as your washboard abs.” Buffybot
“She’s not the decendent of a long line of mystical warriors, she’s the decendant of a toaster oven.” Anya
“You scared me half to death or more death.” Spike
“Big, fast and dumb, just the way I like them.” Buffybot
“Buffy, you’ve been to hell, they have one bedrooms there, right?” Xander
“Incompetently dubbed kung fu, our most valuable Chinese import.” Xander
“Well, if this guy wants to fight with weapons, I’ve got it covered from ‘A’ to ‘Z’, ax to zee other ax.” Buffy
“Another day, another demon.” Buffy
“Welcome to payback Mr. Evil Plan Face Stealer.” Xander
“There comes a point when you have to move on or just buy yourself a Klingon costume and go with it.” Suave Xander
“We should continue to pretend we heard none of the disturbing sex talk.” Giles
“He’s clearly a bad influence on himself.” Giles
“I will know your blood, Slayer, I will make your neck my chalice and drink deep.” Spike
“Don’t worry, Will, you still wear the smarty pants in the family.” Buffy
“I feel like a witch in a magic shop.” Willow in the Magic Shop
“I’m a villain, Spike, hello!” Harmony
“Pacey, you idiot!” Spike
“It does have that icky government feel to it.” Willow
“If you tell me to hurry, I’ll kick you ass.” Buffy
“That guy’s really starting to bug me in that special I want to shove something wooden through his heart kind of a way.”
Buffy
“Don’t Psych 101 me.” Buffy
“There is one peroxide pest whose number’s up!” Buffy
“Take me out of a world that has you in it.” Spike
Dawn: “Check out all the magic stuff”
Giles: “Our new slogan”
“I’ll see your numbness, and raise you a lower back pain.” Xander
“You’re not worried about the Slaymaster General, Big G?” Xander
Willow: “Exertion can lead to sweatiness.”
Tara: “Which can cause the pain and heartbreak of stinkiness.”
“Go Team ‘Me’!” Buffy
“Nice, look who’s got a bad case of Dark Prince envy.” Xander
“…Where’d you get that accent, Sesame Street? Von, two, three…three victims. Mwahahaha!”
Xander
“I am repeat-o-girl.” Buffy
“I suppose Dracula doesn’t use bleach, huh? He’s a darks only man.” Xander
“I will serve you, your excellent spookiness.” Xander
“Sunnydale rule of thumb, avoid white-skinned men in capes.” Buffy
“How do you like my darkness now?” Buffy
“I’m plotting your death, but in a happy way.” Riley
Buffy: “Giles are you breaking up with your car?”
Giles: “Well it did seduce me, all red and sporty.”
Buffy: “Little two door tramp.”
“Did I mention this is a rant, sense really has no place in it?” Buffy
“I got my own gang now.” Harmony
“Most magic shop owners in Sunnydale have the life expectancy of a Spinal Tap drummer.”
Buffy
“We’re building a race of Frog people, good time.” Xander
Buffy to Dawn: “Melinda’s a bad influence. I don’t like you hanging out with someone that short…”
Riley to Buffy: “…A lot of young people nowadays are experimenting with shortness, gotta nip that one in the bud.”
“There’s a lot of different kinds [of demons]; some are very evil, some are considered useful members of society.” Anya
“I am not a eunuch…I mean the curse isn’t all that clear.” Angel
“Anya borka bippity boppity boo.” Xander
Xander: “Just once I’d like to run into a cult of bunny worshippers.”
Anya: “Great, thank you for those nightmares.”
“Alistair Crowley sings, no I don’t have that, but I do have some really nice whale songs.”
Giles
“You told me snakey wakey would find the key.” Glory
“Fun was had, also frolic, merriment, and near death hi-jinks.” Xander
Anya: “So we’re all thinking the same thing, right?
Xander: “Festival, piñata, delicious candy.”
Willow: “Something evil crashed to earth in this and then broke out and slithered away to do badness.”
Giles: “In all fairness, we really don’t know about the slither part.”
Anya: “Oh no, I’m sure it frisked about like a little lamb.”
Riley: “No pulse.”
Anya: “Yup, space lamb got him.”
Xander: “I still don’t get why we had to come here and get info on a killer snot monster.”
Giles: “Because it’s a killer snot monster from outer space.”
“You should never hurt the feelings of a brutal killer.” Xander
“You can tell it’s not going to have a happy ending when the main guy’s all bumpy.”
Tara
“The only chance you had with me was when I was unconscious.” Buffy
“If looks could stake.” Spike
“I’m alive. I can tell ‘cause of the pain.” Xander
“Santa always passes me by, something about the big honkin’ menorah.” Willow
“We do morgue time in the Scooby Gang.” Xander
“Anya, ever the wordsmith.” Xander
"You know magic at the poker table is considered cheating" Xander
"I choose to feel theatened" Anya
"We were gonna do dumb things like hold hands through daisies going 'tra la la'" Buffy
"Double shot of O neg. Make it the good stuff, I don't want no bloody orangutan." Spike
"Would hiding in a cave with a stockpile of chocolate be part of this plan?" Xander
"What'ja think, I'd wake up and we'd go for tea?" Faith
"You're like a cool monster fighter." Tara
"You don't have to worry about me drinking, unless you're here to protect innocent beers." Spike
"I'd hate to see the pursuite of a homicidal lunatic get in the way of pursuing a homicidal lunatic." Xander
"I thought all children despise effort and enjoy cartoons." Anya
"I can beat up a demon until the cows come home and then I can beat up the cows." Buffy
"Weird love's better than no love." Buffy
Tara: "...Willow wants to watch this thing on the History Channel tonight. It's on the witch trial stuff, which is only going to get her upset." Anya:"I was there, it really wasn't that bad. See, if you were a real witch, you could do a spell to escape, so really, it was only bad for the falsely accused and they never have a good time."
Spike: "I'm not a monster." Xander: "Yes, you are a monster. Vampires are monsters. They make monster movies anout them." Spike: "Well you got me there."
Xander: "A watched customer never buys." Anya: "They would if they were patriotic."
"Shouldn't sombeody be asking 'are we there yet?'. Isn't that what small irratatating children do?"
"The better part of a century spent in delinquency just paid off. I hot wired Ben's auto." Spike
"I'm so large with not knowing." Xander
"It only hurts when I answer pointless questions." Giles
"Blood is life." Spike
"Smart chicks are so hot." Xander
Xander: "Pervert!" Anya: "Other pervert!"
"It's an omen. It's a higher power trying to tell me through bunnies that we're all going to die." Anya
"I think I'm gonna live a long and silly life and I'm not interested in doing it without you around." Xander
Buffy:"Remember when things used to be nice and boring?"
Willow: "No."
"Who you gonna call?...God, that phrase is never gonna be usable again is it?" Buffy
"You think I'm evil if I bring a group of girls on a camping trip and don't touch them?" Giles
"You can't beat evil by doing evil." Buffy
Buffy: "There he is on the Hellmouth all day, everyday. That's gotta be like being showered with evil, only from underneath." "Not really a shower." "A bidet, like a bidet of evil."
Anya: "The vengeance demon gig has some down sides." Spike: "All jobs do."
"I like my plan better, get up, get out, get drunk, repeat as needed." Spike
"I've Googled, now I just can't Google no more." Willow
"I'm going gay...Willow, gay me up, I'm mentally undressing Scott Bakula, that's a start." Xander
"I'm not ready for you to not be here." Buffy to Spike
"Screw it mighty forces, I suck at Latin, but that's not the issue, I'm the one in charge and I command the you open up that portal now." Willow
"Being at high school can really feel like being at war." Buffy
"...well, everybody hates the cheerleaders." Buffy
"She's like a woman fighting for more than life, she fights like fighting is her life, it is the air she breathes and she knows she will win because there is no alternative." Andrew
"Are you guys having a fight, 'cause fighting just not cool." Buffy
"It eats you starting with your bottom." Andrew's translation of the Spanish of "from beneath you it devours"
Buffy:"What have you been up to?"
Holden Webster:"Well, apparently dying."
"I think you're confusing me 'cause you're evil." Buffy
"I used to tell the truth all the time when I was evil." Anya
"I'm little, I don't have as much blood as other people." Jonathan's ghost
"You don't need to get all British and dodgy." Buffy
"Anchovies, anchovies, you're so delicious, I love you more than all the other fishes." Dawn
"Maybe we should board these things [windows] up until things are less Hellmouthy." Xander
"Looks like the First made another sacrifice or a music video." Dawn
"Evil names should be like Lex or Voldemort." Andrew
"Sorry to barge in, I'm afraid we have a slight apocalypse." Giles
"This is bad-a new kind of bad." Buffy
"Somehow I don't think fighting prehistoric evil comes with naptime." Buffy
"Maybe The First isn't ready for modern technology." Buffy
"I went over to the Dark, just to pick up a few things." Andrew
"I am standing on the mouth of Hell and it will swallow me whole and choke on me." Buffy
"There is only one thing on earth more powerful than evil and that's us." Buffy to the Scooby Gang
"We don't joke about eating people in this house." Buffy to Spike
"Got the double treat, That's the double sweet, Oh, it's hard to beat, When the meats meet." Buffy
Buffy: "Nice Wheels" Riley: "Came with the car."
Anya: "I think we died in this car on the way to the airport and now we're in hell."
Xander: "The radio said no traffic."
Anya: "It's a hell radio, of course it said so."
"Better no guy than the wrong guy, that's for sure." Sam Finn
"I'm not exactly gun girl." Buffy
Willow: "It's hideous, god Buffy, look at its arms."
Buffy: I know, but it's my duty, I'm Buffy the bride's maid."
"We must share equally in the cosmic joke that is bridesmaidom." Buffy
"Hi, I'm Hymen, god of Matrimony." Hymen, god of matrimony
"I'll say this for the Y chromosome, it looks good in a tux." Willow
"Xander, one of Anya's presents got loose." Dawn
"I'm tired of crying." Anya
Riley: "I got , um , some big stories to tell you if we ever get half a second."
Buffy:"Did you die?"
Riley: "No."
Buffy: "I'm gonna win."
"They don't truck with Satan, that was just me having fun, Satan is a little man." Caleb
Willow: "This girl is bleeding badly, we have to get her to a hospital."
Faith: "Yup, guess I'm back in Sunnydale."
"Let me guess, leather pants, nice right cross, doe eyes, holier than thou glower, you must be Faith." Spike
"You're protecting vampires now? Are you the bad slayer now? Am I the good slayer now?" Faith
Buffy: "He's with me, he has a soul."
Faith: "Oh, like Angel."
Buffy: "Sort of..."
Spike: "No, I'm nothing like Angel, Angel's dull as a table lamp and we have very different coloring."
Faith: "Hey, got a spare bed for a wanted fugitive?"
Giles: "Hello Faith."
Faith: "Huh, guess 'wanted' wasn't really accruate."
Andrew: "Faith, her name invokes aw. Faith, a set of principles or beliefs upon which you are willing to devote your life. The dark slayer, a lethal combination of beauty, power and death. For years and years, or to be more accurate, months, Faith fought on the side of good, terrorizing the evil community, but like so many tragic heroes, Faith was seduced by the lure of the dark side, she wrapped evil around her like a large evil Mexican sarape. She became a cold blooded killer, nobody was immune to her trail of destruction, not friends, not family, not even the most pacifist and logical of all races."
Amanda: "What the hell are you talking about? I thought Faith killed a Volcanologist."
Andrew: "Silly, Silly Amanda, why would Faith kill a person who studied Vulcans?"
Buffy: "I don't want to lead them into war; it can't be the right thing."
Robin: "Most wars aren't, you know."
"Let me tell you something about Buffy, I've been through more battles with Buffy than you all could ever imagine. She's stopped everything that's ever come up against he. This girl's died two times and she's still standing. You're scared, that's smart, you got questions, you should, but don't doubt her motives. You think she's all about the kill, and then you take the little bus to battle. I've seen her heart, this time not literally and I'm telling you right now, she cares more about your lives than you will ever know and you gotta trust her, she's earned it." Xander
Andrew: "I bet even covert operatives eat curley fries, they're really good."
Spike: "Not as good as those onion blossom things."
"I might need a parrot, you know, to go with the eyepatch." Xander
"Killing people changes you, believe me, I know." Buffy
"You are sadness personified." Jonathan
"Boys, it you don't knock it off, I will pull this car over and you can just get out and walk to your painful deaths from here." Xander
"Here we are now, entertain us." Spike
"Willow will make you two boneless chickens skinless too." Xander
"We've got maybe seconds before Darth Rosenberg grinds us into Jawa Burgers and not one of you has the midoclorians to stop her." Andrew
"We both know things might get ugly at Wiccapalooza." Xander
"Sometimes the most adult thing you can do is ask for help when you need it." Giles
"People I love keep dying, and you can't protect me from that." Dawn
"You may be a hopped up uber witch, but this carpenter can dry wall you into the next century." Xander
"'From beneath you it devours', not the friendliest jingle, it's no 'I like Ike' or 'Milk does the bdy good'." Xander
"Have you Googled her?" Willow
"Thanks for sidekicking" Buffy
"Thank you for the generous life saving, now please leave." Anya
Xander: "Once you get back the soul, does that mean you start picking up your own wet towels off the floor?"
Willow: "No, but maybe you just start feeling really bad about leaving them there."
"Anna Nicole Smith thinks you look tacky." Buffy
"No man is worth your life...EVER!" Buffy
"Welcome to the hellmouth, where even outerwear isn't safe." Xander
Xander: "Tough to look at."
Buffy: "And yet my eyes refuse to look away, stupid eyes."
Willow: "Do you have your powder?
Anya: "Oh, I ate that."
"Teleporting isn't a right, it's a privilege." Anya
Buffy: "spike follows the exciting smell of blood and we follow the fairly ripe smell of Spike."
Dawn: "It's smellamentary."
"It's about power, who's got and who knows how to use it." Buffy
The Master: "It's not about being right, it's about being wrong."
Buffy: "It's about power."
Willow: "Is there anything you don't know everything about?"
Giles: "Sychronized swimming, a complete mystery to me."
"In the end we are all who we are." Giles
"Wrong sister, I'm the one who dates dead guys and no offense,but they were hotties." Buffy
"A soul is slipperier than a greased weasle, why do you think I sold mine." Mayor Wilkins
"From beneath you it devourers." woman in Buffy's Dream
"You may not be wanted, but you will be needed." Giles
"Knowledge comes from crafted bindings and pages, Buffy, not ones and zeros." Giles
"You can't swing a cat without hitting some kind of demonic activity." Clem
"There are always casualties in war." Spike
"Giles knows his single malt anaseptics." Anya
"I don't leave crossbows around all willy nilly." Dawn
"War is about death, stupid needless death." Buffy
"Thank God we're hot chicks with superpowers." Buffy
"I started it, the whole having a soul, before it was the cool new thing." Angel
"Are you just going to come down and go all Dawson on me everytime I have a boyfriend?" Buffy
"I'm cookie dough, I'm not done baking." Buffy
"Hey party in my eyesocket and everyone's invited." Xander
"This goes way beyond anything I've ever done,. It's a total loose of control and not in the 'my girlfriend has a pierced togue' kind of way." Willow
"I hate that there's evil." Buffy
"You're gonna get through this no matter how dark it gets." Kennedy
"I used to be a highly respected Watcher. Now I'm just a dwarf with the mystical strength of a doily." Giles
"The mall's gone, I fought on the wrong side." Dawn
"What happens if you went to the last supper and ordered the white?" Caleb
"War is about death, needless stupid death." Buffy
"We're wasting time argueing how to argue." Willow
Faith: "Looks like the hellmouth is offically closed for business."
Giles:"There's another one in Cleveland."
"Has anyone seen my car? It's big and shiney?" Angel
"I'm from Sunnydale, we have our own Hellmouth." Cordelia
"The last thing I want is to show up at the office and find out that I'm working for a homicidal monster." Cordelia
Spike: (Imitating girl)"How can I thank you , you big mysterious, black clad hunk of a night thing. Spike: (imitating Angel)"No need little lady, your tears of gratitude are enough for me. You see, I was once a bad ass vampire, but love and a pesky curse defanged me and now I'm just a big fluffy puppy with bad teeth...Evil is still afoot...quickly to the Angelmobile away!"
Doyle: "I'm still going to celebrate with a drink down at the pub." Cordelia: "He'd celebrate the opening of a mail box with a drink down at the pub."
Oz: "Does he have a gun a hat and a gun?" Cordelia: "Just fangs." Oz: "That works."
Cordelia: "I think the trick is lay off the ale before you start quoting Angela's Ashes and weeping like a baby man. Doyle: "Hey that's a good book." Cordelia: "So I've heard, but I doubt very much that the main characters are not Betty and Barney Rubble as you so vehemently insisted last night."
"You got a real addiction to the brooding part of life." Doyle
"Pen, paper, single malt scotch." Doyle
"How come Patrick Swayze's never dead when you need him." Cordelia
"Oh, Latin, one of those dead languages you always mean to learn." Doyle
"It is possible to brood and show a little interest in the feelings of others." Cordelia
"Am I wrong in thinking that a 'please' and 'thank you' is generally considered good form when requesting a dismemberment?" Cordelia
"I don't care what horrible thing is about to happen, astroids are hurtling towards earth, unspeakable evil is rising in the San Fernando Valley, Jar-Jar is getting his own talk show, whatever, I don't want to hear about it." Cordelia
Angel: "What's the magic word?" Cordelia: "Urgh!" Angel: "No, I don't think 'urgh' is the magic word, if one would consider it a word and even then, certainatly not a magical one."
"There is alway time to be considerate of others." Angel
Angel: "Where are you?" Cordelia: "In the netherworld known as the 818 area code."
"I don't know what we need evil for when we got you right here." Doyle
"Voilence is not gonna solve a thing, on the other hand, it's kind of festive." Doyle
"I didn't ask for this responsibilty, unlike some people who shall remain lifeless." Cordelia
"This is not a needle in a haystack, this is a needle in Kansas." Cordelia
"Nobody likes a smart ass rogue demon hunter!" Cordy
Angel: "Give me a stake!" Cordy: "What? It's 8 in the morning."
"I learned that men are evil-oh wait, I already knew that." Cordy
“I love you so much, I almost forgot to brood.” Wesley imitating Angel
“I was just calculating pi to relax.” Fred
“…the only person I can stand to be around is a neutered vampire who cheats at kitten poker.” Buffy
“Maybe we are meant to be alone.” Cordy
“There’s not a thing about badly reapplied mascara that I don’t know.” Cordy
“He’ll beat you down until you stay down, because he doesn’t even think of you as alive. No woman should ever have to go through that and no woman strong enough to wear the mantel of vicious bitch would put up with it!” Cordy
“Speaking of saliva, where’s Cordy?” Wesley
“So I guess your demoness makes you less petty than humans, almost nobel. I mean in a twisted dark and really disturbing kind of way.” Cordy
“All we can do is live each moment to the fullest and be grateful that we didn’t throw too much money at the NASDAQ.” Cordy
“I was pretty blue for a long time, any longer and I would have turned aquamarine.” Lorne
“This is way beyond my Ken…and my Barbie…and all my action figures.” Lorne
“Destiny is just another word form inevitable, and nothing is inevitable as long as you stand up, look it in the eye and say ‘you’re evitable’.” Fred
“I love children, I could just eat ‘em up.” Darla
“Hail to you potential client.” Groo
“If there’s one thing I learned living on the Hellmouth, every day is precious. You never know when it may be your last.” Cordy
“I was 17 years old and I sold my soul for a truck.” Gunn
“It’s pretty freaky the first time you see your name in a true prophecy all carved in blood on an official scroll.” Sahjahn
“I got loads of gist, but what I don’t got is specifics.” Cordy
“No question, we’ve got ring around the lobby.” Cordy
“The worst spot in Hell is reserved for those who betray.” Lilah
"You're a big hunk of hero sandwich." Lorne
"Boo hoo, let me wipe away the tears with my plastic hand." Lindsey
"One thing you can say about Angel, at least he's consistent. It's always some little blond driving him over the edge." Cordy
"Well I for one would just like to point out the patheticness that is us." Cordy
"Vampires...sloth demons...you know what is really, really evil? Tequila." Cordy
"We came, we sang, we fought the urge to regurgitate." Wesley
"Can't a woman wreak a little havoc without a man being involved?" Darla
"Let them fight the good fight. Someone has to fight the war." Angel
“You just get darker and darker and the funny thing is your aura is beige.” Lorne
“Mmmmm, Angel!” The Transuding Furies
“Are there any men who aren’t just dogs?” Cordy
“I’m Cordelia, I don’t think, I know.” Cordy
“How come whatever we’re searching for is always in the last place we look.” Gunn
“Way out of my area of expertise, I should caution, but hey, who knew William Shatner could sing.” Lorne
“Somebody get these two love vamps a room.” Lorne
“This isn’t mere dust, this is son of dust.” Cordy
Gunn: “I haven’t bothered to see a movie since Denzel was robbed of Oscar for Malcolm X”
Angel: “…who doesn’t love Denzel?”
“Home sweet hotel.” Cordy
“You can’t fire me, I’m vision girl.” Cordy
“Stop flexing your manly boob muscles.” Cordy
“I like my men less broody and more spendy.” Cordy
“You must be all worn out from sleeping for the last three days.” Cordy
“All that power wasted on a whiney mopey do gooder.” Darla
“We should have our own series.” Lindsey
Gym Owner: “That guy has horns!”
Angel: “Steroids, not good for you!”
“In this city you better learn to get along, ‘cuz LA’s got it all; the glamour and the grit, the big breaks and the heartaches, the sweet young lovers and nasty ugly hairy fiends that suck your brains though your face. It’s all part of the wacky variety show we call Los Angeles.”
Lorne
“Your stool pigeon feels safe in a karaoke bar?” Cordy
Cordy: “Cat got your tongue?”
Merl: “I don’t have a tongue.”
“That man will do anything to save a life.” Cordy
Lorne: “ Why ‘Mandy’?”
Angel: “Well, I know the words…I kinda think it’s pretty.”
“The road to redemption is a rocky path.” Faith
“It’s not that vampires don’t photograph, it’s just that they don’t photograph well.” Cordy
“Fear makes people do stupid things.” Angel
“Words I don’t like right off the bat, ‘tomb’ and ‘unearthed’. People, you’ve got to leave your tombs earthed!” Cordy
“I’m not big on tombs, I’m not an after you die outfit.” Cordy
“You can bet if someone ordered a male body part for sacrifice, the world would be atheist like that!” Cordy
“You know, I’m really tired of this ‘Vampire Killed My Sister’ song. Know anything else, like say ‘McArthur Park’?” Angel
“You were just a soulless blood sucking demon, they’re lawyers!” Cordy
“After 400 years of death and destruction, seems to me, you get voted off the island.” Cordy
Gunn: “You roll the camera and wait for the cops to harass us.”
Anne: “How do you know they will?”
Gunn: “’Cause we’re walking while black.”
“Nothing says ‘ah ha I’m onto you’ like being on the receiving end of a vicious police beating.” Cordy
Anne: “How are your laundry skills?”
Cordy: “I’m an actress, I can fake it.”
“The soul is gone, but it leaves a bitterness.” Darla
“It was perfect, Darla. It was perfect despair.” Angel
“Kill her, give her cab fare, whatever.” Lorne
“If all you’re gonna do is switch back to brood mode, I’d rather have you evil.”
Lorne l
“You’d have known that if you hadn’t had your head firmly up your…place that isn’t on top of your neck.” Wesley
Gunn: “So you had an epiphany? What’d you just wake up and ‘bang!’?”
Angel: “ No, it was sort of the other way around.”
“Try not to say ‘gestating’ any more.” Gunn
“If nothing we do matters, then all that matters is what we do, because that’s all there is.” Angel
“If there’s no bigger meaning, then the smallest act of kindness is the biggest thing in the world.” Angel
"I learned that men are evil-oh wait, I already knew that!" Cordy
"Nobody like a smart ass rogue demon hunter!" Cordy
Angel: "Wesley, you don't even have sales resistance. How many Thigh Masters do you own?"
Wesley: "The second one was a free gift."
"That knife is very old, who knows what effect your cooking will have on it." Wesley
Wesely: "Fools rush in." Cordy: "No, he asked you to stay here."
"You'd think people get enough gratuitous violence watching Jerry Springer." Cordy
"If you don't kill, we won't kill you." Angel
"That's way it's a zero tolerance policy, not a maybe just this once policy." Angel
"I got better things to do than wait around for the four bloody horsemen." Spike
Spike: "Any messages for Buffy?" Angel: "Yeah, tell her you're a moron."
"Are we doing this because it's right, or are we doing this because it's cost effective?" Angel
"What, I don't get a goodbye, just because I went crazy and tried to rip your throat out during sex?" Harmony
""I tried being on my own, all independent and evil..." Harmony
"Think someone won't notice us firing a sci fi death ray from outer space?" Gunn
"Nine holes instead of a jury of your peers; just what the Founding Fathers has in mind." Wesley
"Sometimes you gotta work the system before it works you." Gunn
"Rational though, it's an aquired taste." Gunn
"Shouldn't you be out on the street, you know, protecting the city from people like you?" Angel to Spike
"You're like Gandolf the White resurrected from the pit of Balrog, more beautiful than ever, he's alive Frodo, he's alive." Andrew
"Driven insane, by Yoda knows who..." Andrew
"We could play cat and mouse all night or I could wedgie you to unconsciousness and be done with it." Spike
"Bravo, I see your senses seem to be as well honed as your Viggo Mortenson pectorals." Andrew
"Check the screen Uhura, I've got 12 slayers behind me and none of them has ever dated you." Andrew
"I'd give you the finger, but apparently I won't have the motor skills 'til the drug wears off." Angel
""I'm not saying you're right, 'cause I'm incapable of saying that." Spike
I'm a vision of hottiness." Cordy
"Feel my wrath you barrel throwing gorilla." Spike playing Donkey Kong
"Spike's a hero and your CEO of Hell Incorporated-what frickin' bizarre world did I wake up in?" Cordy
"OK, this part I didn't miss, cryptic poetry." Cordy
"Spike, well, well, heard you weren't evil anymore, which kind of makes the hair silly." Cordy
Angel: "Harmony, guard Eve, if she moves, eat her."
Harmony: "Really, thanks!"
"Zombies, oh swell." Angel
"All I did was beat up a tiny Texan." Angel
"I'm just ona different road and this is my off ramp." Cordy
Cordy:"So what do you think?" Lorne: "I think your friend should reconsider the name 'Harmony'."
Cordy: "Ahhhh...oh my God, these are gorgeous....you have amazing taste. You have, like a gay man's taste and that's saying something. I love them so much. Thank you, thank you, thank you, you're the best! Mwhahahahahaha! Ahhh Wooooo! I have to go try these on. New clothes, I have new clothes. Lalalalala! New clothes, I have new clothes ahahahaha." Angel: "I got her new clothes." Cordy: "New clothes, I have new clothes! Ahahahaha!"
Gunn: "Angel's gonna sing? Cordy: "Please, there has to be another way." Wesley: "There has to be, think damnit!"
Cordy:"you should pick something short." Angel:"I was thinking about 'Stairway to Heaven'." Wesley:"Don't even joke about that."
Angel: "You know, when I was in charge, no one questioned my methods or my singing." Cordy: "You're half right."
"Lawyers, don't you people sleep during the day?" Angel
"Can everybody just notice how much fire I'm not on?" Angel
Lorne:"Xenophobia, kind of a watch word where I'm from. Gunn:"I don't get why they are afraid of Xena. I mean, I think she's kind of fly."
"You're gonna make me use my important voice aren't you?" Cordy
"In kind of a hurry to get back to the 'Cordelia's not a princess' dimension, aren't ya?" Cordy
"I chopped off the evil lawyer's hand and he screamed and screamed, then I left." Angel
"I've got visions coming out of my ears, sometimes a little blood too." Cordy
"Why do people keep putting me in charge of things?" Wesley
"Thanks for storing my body on the lice pile instead of the maggot heap." Lorne to his life giver
"You know where I belong, LA, nobody belongs there." Lorne
"Saying people are free, don't make 'em free." Gunn
"What's a better ride than a Mustang?" Angelus
Angel's soul has been misplaced. I'm sure this sort of thing happens all the time." Cordy
"Chicks just love a good accent." Angelus
"Evil doesn't have to mean sloppy." Angelus
"What kind of brain fart made that witch try and let Angelus out?"Gunn
"You're too scared to believe anything, because you're too scared to hope." Cordy
"I don't like being kept in the dark, figuratively anyway." Angelus
Faith: "You okey?" Wesley: "Five by five."
"Ding Dong, the Beast is dead." Lorne
"A weakness for slayers; you're definately his son." Cordy to Connor
"I know who's president, then I sort of wish I didn't." Cordy
"It's always nice to hear the mother tongue, as long as it's not my mother." Lorne
"Don't you think it's some kind of government conspiracy?" Fred
"Poor Connor, engine running, and stuck in park." Lorne
"I just don't think we should rule out the idea of aliens." fred
"Hey, here's a funny side bar, I'm tied to a chair!" Lorne
"Do you think I should keep these alphabetical, or arrange them by how much damage they inflict?" Angel
"Ah, boys, I'd hate to be the little demon who cried apocalype now, but...uh..." Lorne
"I'm listening...with beer." Spike
"Which Apocalypse, the one last year or the year before that." Spike
"I'm a liason, I liaise." Eve
"This isn't hell, it's the 'burbs...close enough." Spike
"The walls don't press in so hard if you can't see them." Lindsey
"Heroes don't accept the world the way it is, they fight it." Lindsey
"Do I look 500?" Angel
Gunn: "So she's like a TV star?"
Wesley: "No, nothing that bad."
Boss, it's getting shouty in your office." Harmony
"has it ever occured to you that now might not be the best time for a 'when we were muck' story?" Wesley to Illyria
"If you want to win in a war, you must serve no master but your own ambition." Illyria
"It's not murder if you say 'yes'." Spike
"Fighting to hold on to what you were, it's destroying you." Angel to Illyria
"It's the remains of the Capo de Famillia of the Goren demon Clan." Angel
"How do you say 'wank off' in Italian?" Spike
"I just want ot see you happy, well not too happy." Spike to Angel
"Dancing...why does it have to be dancing?" Angel
Angel: "I helped save the world, you know."
Spike: "Like I haven't"
"Oh look, American's resorting to violence to solve thier problems, what a surprise." Italian demon
"We're heroes, we don't need higher powers." Angel
"Buffy loves you both, but she's gotta live her life. People change. You guys should try it sometime." Andrew to Angel and Spike
"Part of me knew it would end after high school." Harmony
"If the next words out of your mouth are 'kill Spike', I might just have to kiss you." Angel to the Arch Duke Sebasis
"There's something stronger than loyalty, hope." Arch Duke Sebasis
I happen to be the greatest mass murderer you ever met." Angel
"Live the day like it's your last, because it probably is." Angel
Angel:"This might come out pretentious, but one of you needs to betray me."
Spike: "Can I deny you three times."
"Try not to die, you are not unpleasent to my eyes." Illyria to Gunn
"I crap magic better than this." Vail to Wesley
Lindsey: "Those guys were chumps."
Lorne: "Now they are just chunks."
"Looks like we're getting out the other garden, Eve." Angel
"You're supposed to wear that red stuff on the inside Charlie Boy." Spike
"You 21st century types are so jaded." Sahjahn
Holtz: "You don't believe me."
Wesley: "Mmm, not sure it could be the low scary voice that's giving me trouble."
"You look like hell, not in the fun one where they burn you with pokers for all eternity, but the hardcore one of Nixon adn Britney Spears." Angel to Wesley
It's your Uncle Wes, he loves you bunches, he's just...English." Angel to Connor
Wesley: "I'm still stuck on 'why on earth are we here?'"
Fred:"What, because we're crusaders against evil and now the law firm that represents most of the evil in the world has given us its LA branch to run however we want, probably in an attempt to currupt, divide and destroy us and we all said yes in like three minutes."
Wesely: "Your run on sentances have gotten a lot less pointless."
Knox: "So, do you know how to get to your office from here?"
Fred: "Why, did somebody eat my bread crumbs?"
Wesley: "Pretty powerful position for a young woman."
Eve: "How exactly can you be sure I'm either of those?"
Lorne: "Well this is interesting, apparently old Joe Kennedy tried to got out of his deal with the firm."
Angel:"That explains a lot."
Lorne: "But George Senior, he read the fine print."
You have reached ritual sacrifices, for goats, press one...to sacrifice a loved one or a pet, press the pound key." Answering service of Wolfram and Hart
"I'm a single undead girl trying to make it in the city. I have to start somewhere, and they're evil, they don't judge." Harmony
"I'm like a superhero, if there were a superhero whose skill was typing." Harmony
Angel: "What, I'm not allowed to hit people?"
Wesley: "Not people capable of genocide."
Angel: "Those are exactly the type of people I should be allowed to hit."
"...when blood starts streaming out of our noses, eye sockets, and fingernails, I'll have the intense satisfaction knowing I'm dying with the only people who actually deserve it." Fred to her staff
"There is one thing more powerful than conviction, just one. Mercy." Angel
Spike: "I must be in hell.:
Lorne: "No, LA, but a lot of people make that mistake."
"Honey of a story...the Vampire slayer, both men love and both men lost, oh I could sell that to any studio in a heart beat. I see Depp and Bloom." Lorne
"It's about doing what's right." Fred
Angel:"I liked your poems."
Spike: "You like Barry Manilow."
Fred: "Just proves what I've been saying."
Spike: "What, that I'm a handsome devil who brightens up the place?"
Fred: "That you're worth saving."
"I guess there are worse things than being a ghost." Spike
"Just bathing, it's what one does after banging open a demonic pinata full of rancid Tabasco." Angel
"It's not about good and evil, it's about a party." Lorne
Angel:"It's the perfect recipe for an out of control blood bath."
Lorne:"That describes every good party I've been to ."
Lorne: "...oh, you're watching hockey."
Angel: "Yeah, but my team is losing."
Fred: "I'm totally drunk faced."
Wesley:"Because you can't hold your...what are you drinking?"
Fred: "Nothing."
Wesley: "Well you can't hold that."
"It's not the first time I've had sex under a mystical influence. I went to UC Santa Cruz." Eve
Wesley:"I'd forgotten that Aztec cultures were so violent."
Gunn: "'cause ours is so at peace."
"Hope is the only thing that will sustain you." Wesley
"Wow, turned on by a woman holding an enormas gun, what a surpirse." Fred
"We're taking the cyborg apart in the lab right now. You should see it, it's like an M.C. Escher picture with wires and flesh instead of geese." Fred
"Wolfram and hard, so this is the haven for evil, isn't it?" Roger Wyndom Price
"Sex with robots is more common than people think." Spike
"It's like Winston Churchill and a young Richard Harris has a beautiful love child, which according to my sources is not as ridiculous as it sounds." Lorne
Roger (to Lorne): "Entertainment division, well I can see how that wold be useful in a fight agianst evil."
Gunn:"You'd be amazed at how many horrible movies we've stopped."
Roger: "You really want me to shake that?"
Angel:"Well, I'm really not the hugging type."
Angel:"What happened?"
Spike: "I can't explain everything, apparently, when Percy here was younger, he used to be known as Head Boy."
"Oh yes, Los Angeles, we have to talk about our feelings, then maybe we'll hug." Roger
"I don't know if you know this, but I killed my mum, actually I had already killed her, then she tried to shag me." Spike
"I know we're supposed to work ourselves to death and all, but I'm guessing the firm isn't enforcing that as much as they used to." Knox
"Look what I made, It's called Willy." Drusilla
"Lately I've been wondering what it would be like to share the slaughter of innocents with another man. Don't think that makes some sort of deviant, do you?" Angelus
Spike: "Try staking your mother when she's coming on to you!"
Harmony:"Oh, that explains a lot."
William: "It's like she's got a bit of child in her."
Angelus: "Probably two or three by now."
"That's just the tip of the fritzburg." Fred
Angel: "HARMONY!"
Gunn: "She's off having a nooner with blondie Bear."
"We've got trouble, with a capitol "T" and that rhymes with "P" and that stands for prophacy." Eve
"I think I'll take my new flash and bones across the pond." Spike
"All these years believeing you're a significant monkey,only to find out you're just a big hunk of nobody cares." Spike
"Look at you. thinking you're the big savior, fighting for the truth, justice and soccor moms." Spike
Spike: "You used to hit a lot harder."
Angel: "No you're head's just gotten thicker."
"This souled ex-ghost vampire's got some drinking to catch up on." Spike
"You know, funny thing about throwing the universe out of wack, not as fun as it sounds." Eve
There's no room for doubt, only love." Jasmine
"Nothing like a homicidal maniac to put a dampre on an impromptu spiritual gathering." Lorne
I got pilgrims pitching pup tensts in the parking lot, try saying that five times fast." Lorne
Connor: "Where are those people?"
Jasmine: "I ate them."
Connor: "Cool."
"Tonight the part of Judas Iscariot will be played by Krevlornswath of the Deathwak Clan." Lorne
"We need a damn break, and the universe doesn't seem to be handing out breaks to underdogs lately." Gunn
"I guess it's time to shoot the messenger or chop chop the messenger up into little bitty pieces." Angel
"We've all done horrilble things; all we can do is try to make up for it." Angel
Groo:"Thou it's not real mock-ma, it is very close to real."
Cordy: "So it's mock mock-ma"
"Leaving on the midnight train to Georgia. Actually it's the 9:18 flight to Vegas tomorrow, but where's the poetry in that." Lorne
"Hi honey, I have your favorites, tuna nad ice cream, how 'bout you try not mixing them together." Cordy
"Angel investigations, I know we can help you." Angel
"Watch that dirty look, that's what got me going in the first place." Lilah
Lilah:"Don't be thinking about me when I'm gone."
Wesley:"I wasn't thinking about you when you were here."
"I'm late, I'm late, and it's not a date." Cordy
"You should have seen the size of the dust bunnies under Cordy's bed. They were more like dust sperm whales." fred
"I'm still working on a plan, but so far it still involoves being somebody's bitch." Fred
"I'm fibbing, it's lying, only classier." Gwen
"I know you've been out of the loop for a while, but I'm still evil, I only do evil errands." Lilah
"This place was much friendlier when the mob ran it." Angel in Las Vegas
"Think bubblehead." Cordy
"People you love are your destiny." Lorne
"Death just doesn't look good on me." Lorne
"They talk about me in the chatty rooms?" Angel
"Where's a future reading empathy demon when you need him?" Gunn
"You were always slave...you just couldn't see the chains." Wesley
"His nickname back on Cortoth was The Destroyer, and unless you put Conan in front of that, I'm guessing it's not a good sign." Gunn
"Life should be bright and beautiful." Angel
"I've made many mistakes, but fear is not one of them." Lilah
"There's a differance between wishing vengence on someone and taking it." Angel
"We live as though the world were what it should be to show the world what it can be." Angel
"You're preaching to the voice that ate the choir." Angelus
Willow: "You must be Angel's handsome yet androgynous sin."
Connor: "It's Connor."
Willow: "And the sneer's genetic, who knew?"
Willow: "How you been?"
Cordy: "Higher being, you?"
Willow: "Ultimate evil, but I got better."
"Good things come in jars, peanut butter, jelly, those two-headed fetal pigs at the Natural History Museum. Come on, everybody loves fetal pigs." Willow
"It does seem like you've given into the grumpy side of the force." Willow
Faith:"You kiss your mamma with that mouth?"
Angelus: "No, but I ate her."
Angel: "Even with a soul I've done things I wish I could take back."
Angelus: "Yeah, like those Manilow concerts."
"Never stop fighting." Angel
"Put me on the short bus and send me off to clueless school." Lorne
"Quick as you can say Easy Bake Oven, she's got a bun in hers." gunn
"I've spent most of this year trapped in what can only be described as a supernatural soap opera." Gunn
Lorne: "You saying poppin' mamma threw you a beating?"
Lorne: "Kid Vicious did most of the lifting, Cordy just Mwa ha ha haed at us."
Angel:"If I'm not back in a couple hours..."
Gunn: "You're dead, we're screwed, end of the world."
"You really thing that safety can be plucked from the arms of an evil deed?" Darla
"You know I've always wondered how many chunks you gotta chop a vampire in before it goes all dust bunny on you." Skip
"Listen to your heart." Darla
"This is what you came back from the dead for? To play Let's Make an Evil Deal?" Angel
"There's only one thing that can change everything and that's death." Connor
"If belonging means you follow some bogus god and killing in his name, you're damn right we don't belong." Gunn
"People get born for all sorts of reasons." Angel
"Never give up, never surrender." Gunn
"Our fate has to be our own or we are nothing." Angel
"We've all done horrible things; all we can do is try to make up for it." Angel
Fred: "What did we do with our lives before we got these jobs?"
Wesley: "I seem tho recall lots and lots of Jenga."
"It's funny how you lose part of your mind when you stop using it." Sam Lawson
Angel: "You're a Nazi?"
Spike: "Oh no, I just ate one."
"We all need a reason to live, even if we're already dead." Lawson
Lorne: "Maybe it's some sort of puppent cancer."
Angel: "I do not have puppet cancer."
"Angel, you're a wee little puppet man." Spike
"Yes, I'm a puppet, that doesn't mean you don't have work to do." Angel
"A fight suits us just fine Papa Smurf." Lorne
Nina: "Are you ok?"
Angel: I'm made of felt, my nose comes off."
"No secrets in the house of pain." Gunn
"If cavemen and astronauts got in a fight, who would win?" Spike
"Come on, let's save the day." Angel
Spike: After we save Fred, we should hit the West End, take in a show."
Angel: "I've never seen Les Miz."
Spike: "Trust me, halfway through the first act, you;e be drinking human's again."
"Why would anyone make a bottle this small? It's inhuman...it's like a bloody tease, it's like here's what a bottle of Jack would look like if you actaully had one or here's a drink, but it's very far away." Spike
Angel: "What does it mean..that she's gone?"
Spike: "In a world of men, a person dies, they stay that way."
Angel: "Unless you're a vampire."
Spike: "Or the ghost of one that saved the world."
Angel: "Or Buffy. Death doesn't have to be the end, in our world rules can be broken, all you have to do is push hard enough."
Harmony: "Gonna torture him?"
Gunn: "Thinking about it."
Harmony: "Can I help? I'm really good at it."
I've been unreasonable becasue I've lost all reason." Wes
"Who did he think he was fooling, besides all of us." Harmony
"The girl of your dreams loved you. That's more than most people get." Harmony
Illyria: "Your breed is fragile, how is it that they came to control the world?"
Knox: "Opposable thumbs."
Illyria: "We cling to what is ogne. Is there anything in this life but grief?"
Wes: "There's love, there's hope, for some there's hope you'll find something worthy that will lead you to some joy, thet after everything, you can still be surprised."
Take my love.
Take my land.
Take me where I cannot stand.
I don’t care, I’m still free.
You can’t take the sky from me.
Take me out into the black.
Tell ‘em I ain’t comin’ back.
Burn the land and boil the sea.
You can’t take the sky from me.
Have no place I can be
Since I found Serenity.
But you can’t take the sky from me.
-Firefly Theme by Joss Whedon
Wash: "Don't you just hate doctors?"
Simon: "Hey!"
Wash: "I mean, present company excluded."
Jayne: "Let's not go excluding people, that would be rude."
"He looks better in red." River after slicing Jayne's chest
Simon:"For this to work, River and I will have to be dead."
Jayne:"I'm starting to like this plan."
Mal: "If you see any one, smile."
Zoe: "I don't think anyone smiles in hospitals."
Mal: "Of course they do, it's the Corps, everybody's all rich and happy."
"You turn on any of my crew, you turn on me." Mal
Mal: "You know they [cows] walk just as easy if you lead 'em."
Jayne: "I like smaking them."
"We should start dealing in those black market beagles."
"They weren't cows inside. They were waiting to be, but they forgot. Now they see sky and they remember." River
Book (bleeding):"...afraid I might need a preacher."
Mal: "Good, you just lie ther and be ironic."
"Dear diary, today I was pompous and my sister was crazy. today we were kiddnapped by hill folk never to be seen again, it was the best day ever." Jayne reading fantasy entries in Simon's journal
"You gave up everything you had to find me; you found me broken." River to Simon
"A government is a body of people, usally notable ungoverned." Book
"No power in the 'verse can stop me!" Kaylee
"One cannot always be one's self in the company of men." Inara
"If I want medical jargon, I'll talk to a doctor." Mal to Simon
"We're deep in space, corner of no and where." Mal
Wash: "Little River's just getting more colorful by the moment, what will she do next?"
Zoe: "Either blow us up or rub soup in her hair, it's a toss up."
Wash: "I hope she does the soup thing, it's always a hoot and we don't die from it."
Jayne: "Anyone remeber her coming at me with a butcher's knife?"
Wash: "Wacky fun!"
"She killed them with mathmatics." Jayne
Wash: "That sounds like something out of science fiction."
Zoe: "We are on a spaceship dear."
Jayne: "I don't like the idea of someone hearing what I'm thinking."
Inara: "No one likes the idea of hearing what you're thinking."
"Come on out River, the nice man wants to kidnap you." Simon
"We live to fight another day." Mal
"This is a fertile land, and we will thrive, we will rule over all this land and we will call it...This Land." Wash playing with his plastic dinosaurs
Zoe: "I know something ain't right."
Wash: "Sweetie we're crooks, if everything were alright, we'd be in jail."
"Ten percent of nothing is...let me do some math here...nothing." Jayne
"Jayne, you're mouth is talking, you might want to look to that." Mal
Mal: "If anyone gets in the way...shoot 'em."
Zoe: "Shoot 'em?"
Mal: "Politely"
Book: "Captain, do you mind if I say grace?
Mal: "Only if you say it out loud."
"That's what governments are for, get in a man's way." Mal
"Can we maybe vote on the whole murdering people issue." Wash
Mal: "Just scare him."
Jayne: "Pain is scary."
"I'm confused, no wait, I think maybe you're confused." Simon to Mal
"We are just too pretty for God to let us die." Mal
"They tell you never hit a man with a closed fist, but on occasion it is hilarious." Mal
"Shouldn't you be off bringing religiosity to the fuzzy wuzzys?" Mal to Book
"It's impressive what nothing can do to a man." Jayne
"How we treat our dead is what makes us different." Book
"Now we're your favored guests, treated to the finest beverages that make you blind." Mal to Badger
"See how I'm not punching him, I think I've grown." Mal
"This place gives me an uncomfortableness." Jayne
"You can't open the book of my life and jump in the middle." Mal
"Don't feel bad, he makes everyone cry. He's like a mean monster." Kaylee
"You have the same rights as anyone, to live and kill people." Mal
"It's my estimation that everyone that ever got a statue made of 'em was one kind of son of a bitch or another." Mal
"The whole point of swearing is that it ain't appropriate." Kaylee
"Easy peasy." simon
"Eggs, a living legend needs eggs." Jayne
"What's do damn important about being proper." Kaylee
"You paid money for this sir, on purpose?" Zoe
"Everybody dies alone." Mal
Wash: "Likely crash can kill us all."
Mal: "Well, let me know when that happens."
Wash: "OK."
Simon: "Captain's a good fighter, he must know how to handle a sword."
Zoe: "I tihnk he knows which end to hold."
"I don't like fellas that kill me, not in general." Mal
"There's a special place in hell for people like you, reserved for child molesters and those who talk during movies." Book
"Oh my God, we're doomed! Who's flying this thing? Oh that would be me." Wash
"It's impressive what nothing can do to a man." Jayne
"How we treat our dead is part of what makes us different from those who did the slaughtering." Mal
"They tell you never to hit a man with a closed fist, but on occasion it is hilarious." Mal
Mulder: "Scully do you believe in an
afterlife?" Scully: "I'd settle for a life in
this one."
"Do you know how difficult it is to fake your own
death, only one man has ever achieved it...Elvis."
Mulder
"Telekinesis, like how Carrie got even at the
prom?" Scully
Scully: "What is it and alien implant?" Mulder:
" Two, I had them made into earrings."
Scully:"It smells like bile." Mulder:
"Is there anyway to get this off my fingers quickly
without betraying my cool exterior?"
Vampire: "Don't you want to live forever?" Mulder:
"Not if drawstring pants come back in style."
"No government agency holds jurisdiction over the
truth." Mulder
"...God made heaven and earth and didn't bother to
tell anyone about his side projects." Mulder
"I'm not even gonna ask if you said what I think you
said, because I know it's what you said."
Scully
Scully: "Would you file that under the cockroach
that ate Cincinnati?" Mulder: "No, the
cockroach that ate Cincinnati is under the 'C's', Mothman
is under the 'M's'."
"Twenty more bodies and we'll have a honey baked
ham." Mulder
"They had their frying pan...violated." Mulder
"How many folk tales do you know that could eat a
Boy Scout and a biologist?" Mulder
"The fiercest enemy is a man that has nothing left
to lose." CSM
"You're an invertebrate scum sucker, whose moral
dipstick is about two drops short of bone dry."
Mulder
"What did you get for Halloween Charlie Brown?"
Mulder
"Stupid-ass haircut!" Mulder
"Please explain to me the scientific definition of the
whammy." Scully
"You can't bury the truth." Mulder
"The dead speak to us from beyond the grave, that is
what conscious is." Scully
"Just because you're wearing the suit, doesn't mean it
fits." Mulder
"Resistance is possible." WMM
"Have the father say a few 'Hail Mulder's' for
me."
Mulder: "You don't suppose she's a virgin?" Scully:
"I doubt she's even a blond."
"I was hoping you'd help me solve the mystery of the
horny beast." Mulder
"You can kill a man, but you can't kill what he
stands for." CSM
"I found her story compelling, but then again I
believed the Warren commission." Mulder
Krycek: "You must be losing it Mulder, I can beat
you with one hand." Mulder: "Isn't that how
you like to beat yourself. If those are my last words, I
can do better."
Mulder:"Spender just round files this case, it's
unconscionable." Scully: "And what do you
call rooting through his trash?"
"No matter how paranoid you are, you aren't paranoid
enough." Susanne Modeski
"What I don't want to see is the Bills winning a
Super bowl, as long as I'm alive, that never
happens." CSM
"Life is like a box of chocolates, a cheap
thoughtless perfunctory gift that nobody ever asks for.
Unreturnable, because all you get back is another box of
chocolates. So you're stuck with this undefinable whipped
mint crap that you mindlessly wolf down when there is
nothing else left to eat. Sure, once in a while there's a
peanut butter cup or an English toffee, but they're gone
too fast and the taste is fleeting. So you end up with
nothing but broken bits filled with hardened jelly and
teeth shattering nuts...If you're desperate enough to eat
those, all you have left is an empty box filled with
useless brown paper wrappers." CSM
"Did you really think you could call up the devil and ask him to behave?" Mulder
Scully: "Well it's obviously not a vampire." Mulder: "Why?" Scully: "Because they don't exist."
Scully: "Should we Arrest David Copperfield?" Mulder: "Yes we should, but not for this."
Well Manicured Man: "I trust we're alone." Mulder: "We're all alone in New York City Sir."
Scully: "Did you ever entertain the idea of finding life on this planet?" Mulder:
"I've seen the life on this planet, Scully, and that's exactly why I'm looking elsewhere."
"I'm so ripe, I'm rotten." Mulder
"If people knew the true price of spirituality, there'd be more athiest." Dr. Blockhead
"Mulder, frogs just fell from the sky!" Scully
"Even the devil can quote scripture to fit his needs." Mulder
"Everyone gets tattoo they deserve." Tattoo artist
"If this is monkey pee, you're on your own." Scully
"The statue of liberty is on vaction." X
"Just 'cause I work for the federal government doesn't mean I'm an expert on cockrouches." Mulder
"Aren't you expecting me to sprout vampire fangs?" CSM
"They can change your name, but they can't change the things you love." Deep Throat
"Get up and fight the fight." Scully
Scully: "Yeah, but Mulder we're in Orange County." Mulder: "What's your point?"
Mulder: "Is that brain matter?" Scully: No I'd say it's ground beef."
"I'm sorry, but this is like good cop insane cop." Bob Roberts
"Go Ahead Scully, naysay me." Mulder
"Single minded, sounds like someone I know." Scully
Scully:"Besides 2001 is the actual start of the new millenium." Mulder: "Nobody likes a math geek."
"Intersting was when were looking for Wyle E. Coyote." Scully
"These particular serpents were serving evil. Are you going to put that on our travel request?" Scully
The hand may be quicker than the eye, it still leaves finger prints." Mulder
and some thoughts on the X Files...
"Whatever helps you sleep
at night CSM."David Duchovany responding to William B. Davis' claim
that CSM is the real hero
"So I'm
confused...does Mulder have to go looking for Squiggy
now?"Angie after Dreamland I
"Each week they don't show up, I'm a happy Phile."Beth regarding Spender and Fowley
"Everyone else wants to kiss Mulder on
the lips, why wouldn't Krycek?"Alora
"The shows moniker is 'the truth is out
there', not 'the truth is right in front of your
face'."Nick Lea
"Go Canerman sperm."Kelly
"My theory is that the world will collapse. Armageddon. And there'll just be Krycek standing there with a cockroach on his prosthetic arm." Chris Owens
"I want my stinking RatBoy!" Shele
"He's not a good guy, frankly." Rosie O'Donnell regarding CSM
"And the moral of the story is never send a weasle to do a fox's job, unless you send a rat for back up." Laura
"Remember the good old days when oily aliens were taking over Ratboys?" KC
"If you're gonna have delusions, you may as well go for the really grand ones." Marcus Cole
"The words and I will be locked in combat until one of us surrenders." G'Kar
"You have that vacant look in your eyes that says hold your head to my ear and you will hear the sea." Londo Mollari
"Go away, repress someone else." G'Kar
"There's enough guilt in the world going around without grabbing for more." Susan Ivanova
"If the primates that we came from had known that politicians would someday come out of the gene pool, they'd have stayed up in the trees and written off evolution as a bad idea." John Sheridan
Corwin:"So I guess the operative phrase is trust no one."
Ivanova: "No, trust Ivanova, trust yourself, anybody else, shoot 'em!"
"There is only one truth about war...people die." Sheridan
"The First casualty of war is always the truth." Sheridan
"There is nothing political about the truth." Sheridan
"Always plant a lie inside the truth, it makes it easier to swallow." Sheridan
"Half the truth is worse than a lie." Jeffrey Sinclair
"Understanding is a three edged sword, your side, their side and the truth." Kosh
"You can't kill the truth, actually you can kill the truth, but it always comes back to haunt you later." Sheridan
"The quiet ones are the ones that change the universe, the loud ones only take the credit." Londo
"There is something in here, and that something is me giving you a direct order." Ivanova
"There is no greater power in the universe than the need for freedom." G'Kar
"I've learned the more vehemently a rumor is denied the more often it tends to be true." Lenonn
"The true source of pain is neither the hand nor the heart, it is the mouth." G'Kar
"I carry a sword in my hand, you carry yours in your mind. As I see it, that gives you a two to one advantage." Ta'lor
Michael Garabaldi: "I'm an eye for an eye kind of a guy."
Delenn: "So you support a system that would leave everyone blind and toothless."
(This paraphrased from "Fiddler on the Roof")
"I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair, then I thought, wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them. So now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness in the universe." Marcus
Girabaldi: "We went up against the entire alliance and two carrier groups."
Security Officer: "Yeah, but this is the Post office, we could get in real trouble!"
"He who controls the information, controls the world." Stephen Franklin
"On a scale of one to ten, how stupid do you think I am?" Alfred Bester
Lockley: "...And if Garibaldi dies?"
Bester: "Zack gets his room."
"You can't talk to them, you can talk to her, you can talk to me, everyone talks to me, I guess I just have that kind of face." Bester
"Big concerns grow from small concerns. You plant them, water them with tears, fertilize them with unconcern, if you ignore them, they grow." Londo
"May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Ivanova-Old Egyptian Blessing
"Finders keepers. Loser...buy from finders." Isaac
"If you're going to be worried every time the universe doesn't make sense, you're going to be worried every moment of every day for the rest of your natural life." G'Kar
"If your falling off a cliff, you may as well try to fly, you've got nothing to lose." Sheridan
"What do you want you moon faced assassin of joy?" Londo
"The avalanche has started, it is too late for the pebbles to vote." Kosh
"If you can not say what you mean, you can never mean what you say." Durano
"Embrace the moment, in the end, that's all we have." Dr. Franklin
"Trouble will come in it's own time, it always does, but that's tomorrow, give me today and I'll be happy." Sheridan
"If you confront the universe with good intentions in your heart, it will reflect that and reward your intent, usually it just doesn't do it in the way you expect." G'Kar
Sheridan:"You have a face people trust."
Ivanova: "I'd rather have a face people fear."
"I apologize for the lack of chains, the cleaning service must have removed them." G'Kar
"Politics and morality on the same side? That doesn't happen everyday." Vir Cotto
"Death... been there done that!" Sheridan
"You do not make history, you can only hope to survive it." G'Kar
"It is not necessary to know, it is only necessary to try." Lennier
"We can't be free until we learn to laugh at ourselves." G'Kar
"From laughter comes wisdom." G'Kar
"The sneak attack is the first resort of a coward." Sinclair
"If I knew who god was, I'd thank her." Garibaldi
"Why does the universe give us puzzles with out answers?" G'Kar
"If any religion is right, then maybe they all have to be right, maybe." Sinclair
"God doesn't care how you say your prayers, just as long as you say them." Sinclair
"What we hold sacred gives our lives meaning." Sinclair
"Never hand someone a gun, unless you know where he will point it." Sinclair
"Hope is all we have." Lorien
"Now is all we have." Delenn
"There's nothing wrong with falling down, as long as you end up just two inches taller when you pick yourself up off the floor." Sheridan
"Home is not a place, it's where ever your passion takes you." Sheridan
"In the long run if you stay true to what you believe, things do work out." Sheridan
"No boom today, boom tomorrow, there's always a boom tomorrow." Ivanova
"Worst case of testosterone poisening I've ever seen." Ivanova
"It's bad luck to die on an empty stomach." G'Kar
"I like you, you're trouble." Drall
"...no race can be truely intellegent without laughter" Delenn
"The Universe is already mad. Anything else would be redundant." G'Kar
Delenn's Promise To Sheridan
I choose you to be my friend and lover
One to help me find peace and serenity.
I'll be there to share with you in
The bonds that you build.
I will even help you keep your soul
Filled with confidence and strength.
Because, for a friend and lover...
I choose you.
I'm glad you're choosing me for your lifemate.
I choose you to dream my dreams
And to share my beliefs of our future.
When you sing your happy songs
I'll be there with you.
And I'll be there when you sing
Your sad songs too.
Because for a friend and lover
I have chosen you.
And my heart is glad
That you have chosen me
To be your mate too.
Dureena Nafeel: "You never tell anyone the whole truth." Matthew Gideon: "Who does?"
Gideon: "The tests were conducted on rats, how do I know it will work on me?"
Dureena: "Well to answer that we'd have to figure out the difference between a rat and a starship captain and we don't have that much time."
"Did you know in the 20th century that they actually thought salt was bad for you. Listen to the animals I say. The lion will sit down with the lamb to share the salt lick. Good enough for them, good enough for me." Max Eilerson
"Never contradict a Technomage when he's saving your life...again." Galen
"If you wanted to think, you should never have joined the military in the first place." Galen
"If I'm going to die, I'd rather die in a room with a view." Galen
"There is always hope. It's the only thing nobody's figured out how to kill yet." Max
"Don't stand by when we're one world away from good news." Gidion
"If it's worth fighting to get, it's worth fighting to keep." Gidion
"I figure if I put you them all in the same room, maybe the truth will wander in by accident." Gidion
"I couldn't leave without saying good bye to myself." Evil Kira (DS9)
"Darts and bars go together like bacon in eggs." Miles O'Brien (DS9)
"Sometimes life seems so complicated, nothing is truly good or truly evil, everything seems to be a shade of gray...and then you spend some time with a man like Dukat and you realize that there is such thing as truly evil...I fear no evil. From now on, it's him or me." Benjamin Sisko (DS9)
"I'll recover any severed limbs, just don't misplace them." The Doctor (V)
"Logic is irrelevant" 7 of 9 (V)
"I'll complain if I want to, I find it comforting." The Doctor (V)
"Don't panic, it's counterproductive." 7 of 9 (V)
"Impossible is a word humans use far too often." 7 of 9 (V)
"The Borg, party poopers of the galaxy." The Doctor (V)
Janeway:"Are you ready for some home cooking?" Chakotay: "I'll alert sickbay." (V)
7 of 9:"You will be assimilated." Nelix: "Not now, maybe later." (V)
"A man can not be held responsible for what his mind does when he sleeps." Jean Luc Picard (TNG)
"That's the wonderful thing about crayons, they can take you to more places than a starship." Guinan (TNG)
"Better safe than assimilated." Chakotay (V)
"When it comes to affairs of the human heart, it is wise to look beyond logic." Tuvok (V)
Sisko: "What are you doing, you don't cook" Cassidy: "I know I was just making sure." (DS9)
"My greed has to be a shining light to everyone" Quark (DS9)
"There's no place like home, no matter what colour the water is." Dr. Bashir (DS9)
"Do they still sing songs of the great Tribble hunt?" Odo (DS9)
"My kid swindled your honor student at the Ferengi College of Business-Where students learn to profit from more than just mistakes." Bumper Sticker
"'Energize' said the Captain-and a pink bunny appeared." Bumper Sticker
Trek links
There are tons and tons of Trek links out there...here are some to get you started....
Official Star Trek Site-This is very difficult to navigate around especially if you are looking for specific information, but there is a lot of stuff there.
Max Evans: "I'll just have an alien blast." Liz Parker: "Me too."
"The problem with following your heart is sometimes it takes you places you shouldn't be." Liz
"Human/alien relationships are bound to be disasterous" Marie
"You can never trust the law to share information." Milton
"Mosquitos, pit toilets, and animal droppings, YES!" Isabell Evans
"The right reply would be, 'I'll take care of that Mr. Frakes.'" Jonathan Frakes
Max: I’m King of the world.
Tess: Yeah, but not this one.
Max:” You can’t compare The Matrix to Crouching Tiger.”
Michael: “Crappy Tiger is a chick flick with Kung Fu.”
Max: “First of all Crappy…Crouching Tiger is actually about something…Love, honor, duty.”
Michael: “Matrix is about something …Illusion, reality, gunfire.”
Max:” You simply cannot compare Keanu Reeves to Michelle Yeoh, I won’t let you!”
"I'm Liz Parker and five days ago I died. After that things got very weird."
"The eraser room does two things. It cleans erasers and it takes our innocence." - Maria to Liz
Max: "I'll just have an 'Alien Blast'."
Liz: (under her breath) "Me too."
Max: (smiling) "Excuse me?"
"Sorry I can't get this involved. I'm alone and that's the way it's gotta be." - Michael t
"Max I know you. You only listen to the Counting Crows when you're really upset."
Isabel
"Listen Maxwell, you are a sensitive guy and you have available to you one of the top three seduction lines available with 'It's going to help me find my home planet' and you're refusing it. No guy’s that sensitive. Use it."
Michael
"Okay we're leaving now, but I got some Chaka Khan queued up in the CD player."
Michael to Max
"So give it to me straight or you won't be giving it to me at all." Maria to Michael
"You are who you choose to be." Liz
"Whether I die tomorrow or fifty years from now my destiny is the same. It's you. I want to be with you, Liz. I love you." Max
"You have a hicky and it's glowing!" Max
"This is like cruel and unusual education" Maria
"We trust no one, we never have, we never will." Isabell
"Suddenly we're accessories to Czechoslovakians" Maria
Maria: "You do not watch The View." Michael: "It helps me get in touch with my feminine side"
Maria: "Did you pull on the chokey thing?" Michael: "Yes I did pull on the chokey thing."
"My idea of the great outdoors in rolling the windows fown on my car on the way to the mall." Maria
"No rock stands a chance against Michael Guirin." Max
"Welcome to the ever burgeoning, I know an Alien Club." Nesado
"Keep talking like that and I'll slag you with my x-ray eyes." Tess
"She's not a fugitive, she's just wanted by the law." Isabell
"Wonder what alien crystals are going for on E-Bay." Kyle
"I'm kind of a magnet for intergalactic trouble." Michael
"Sometimes it's better just to walk away with your victories." Sherrif Valente
"The guy was huge, he's like some kind of Greek god or something." Seamus 'Rashboy' Harper
"Nothing worth doing is easy." Dylan
"No transgression is unforgivable, except pride." Rev Bem
"In combat, knowledge isn't a luxury, it's a necessity." Dylan
"The universe hates you , deal with it." Harper
"It's all fun and games 'til someone burns a retina." Harper
Trance: "Patching him up is as easy as cake." Dylan: "Easy as pie." Trance: "Are you sure about that? I think that making a pie is a lot harder than cake."
"I can usually spot a planet, they are very large and I have good eyes." Tyr
"Be careful who you shake hands with, they may come away bloody." Tyr
Beka Valentine:"I read the First Officer'sjob description. Playing Devil's Adovacate is on page three." Dylan:"Get thee behind me Satan."
"I wish you would stop looking for beauty in things that want to kill us." Tyr
"I'm still trying to figure out this poisoning yourself for fun, I think I like it." Trance
"You're making sexual overtures in a dead language." Andromeda
"If you erase history you just erase its lessons." Harper
Trance: "I want you to drink this very slowly, it's water." Dylan: "How?" Trance: "How? well, when two hydrogen atoms love eachother very much, they bond with an oxygen atom."
Bekka: "Where'd you get all the candles?" Tyr: "I rendered them from the fat of my enemies."
"The only thing you can control are your own intentions, everything else is just a roll of the dice." Trance
"If you start with good intentions, you have a better chance of ending up with good." Trance
"In my experience, devils very rarely wear horns and carry pitch forks." Tyr
"Never underestimate the power of words." Tyr
"I really should shave those little hairs on the back of my neck." Harper
"I believe that anything that can love has a soul." Rev Bem
Romy: "I've learned that it's dangerous to love. It can drive you crazy." Rev Bem: "Then perhaps that's what tears are for."
"Be careful, he's go two loaded guns and you've only got a bad temper." Trance
"You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar, though I don't know why you'd want to catch flies, they're dirty little things." Trance
"Innocence is a beautiful thing...but it is also a luxury." Dylan
"Fight if you must, kill if you must, but only if you must." Rev Bem
"There are no stronger weapons that hope and mercy." Rev Bem
"Everyone I know is fighting to get back what they had, I'm fighting 'cause I don't know how to do anything else." Cara "Starbuck" Thrace
"You got something to live for now, not just die for." Hilo
"I don't do guilt" Adama
"You protected your people and made them feel safe enough to feel brave." Adama
"It's breakfast, lunch and dinner until we find a hot fudge planet." Chief Tyrol
Starbuck:"I have a suggestion you won't like."
Apollo: "Do you make any other kind?"
"You've seen one nova, you're seen them all." Col. Tigh
"Without free will, what are you?" Caprica
"It's marriage, that's why we build bars." Tyrol
"There's a trick to being human, you have to think only about yourself." Baltar
"There's hate and there's allowing hate, two sides of the same coin really, we're guilty of both." Adama
"A kick in the butt's worth a thousand words." Lee 'Apollo' Adama
"You're a soldier,live like one." Adama
"Sometimes you have to do things you hate to survive to fight another day." Caprica
"What if rough patches are all we have left?" Cali
"We've been at war so lon. sometimes we forget what we're fighting for." Adama
"You make choices and you live with them, and in the end you are those choices." Admiral Kane
"Don't hold back just because I have a pulse." Lee
"Ain't it grand when a plan comes together." Starbuck
"Just because you're dead is no reason to give up." Daisy Adare
"Why is it my cosmic destiny to do paperwork?" George Lass
"When you put so much effort into hating your day job, it's easy to forget you're learning something." George Lass
"That dollar could be part of the 'Free Mason' fund." Mason
"I'm already dead, couriosity can't kill me." George
"All these bloody assumptions society makes, you know, get a job, eat food, live in a house. It's facism, that is, it's bloody facism, and I'm not gonna take it!" Mason
"I'm gonna stake my own claim and claim my own steak." Mason
"If you're hiding, more often than not, your fears will come looking for you." George
"I was finding that the most important rule in my life, was equally important in death, quit before you're fired." George
"Maybe someday when computers get big enough and can track the universe, we'll see that everything balances out." George
"Everyone needs to steal a bit of someone they love." Doloris Herbig
"Do I have to set my house on fire to get a snack?" Reggie Lass
"I wanted a kitty cat, but I got a little sister instead." George
"If Romeo has sex just a couple times a week, he would have saved both those families a heap of trouble." Daisy
"My dad was right, human beings are simple, predictable cliches." Georgia
"Just because you're dead is no reason to give up." Daisy
"Death happened, it happened a lot, randomly." George
"Public transportation is the great equalizer." Rube
"You want to be an ex drug addict, act like one!" Rube
"You're like a bird without a song,a really mean bird." Daisy
"I don't want to fit in, bit I don't want to stand out." George
"The more I stay out of the way, the more they notice me." George
"Don't let the blond locks deceive you, I'm a very powerful woman." Daisy
"Escape from routine is good for the soul." Rube
"Sometimes coffee is just coffee." George
"Who has been making grilled cheese sandwiches with the difribulator paddles." Deloris Herbig
"I think when someone you love dies, you get a pass on normal." George
"Losing yourself in your work could be a good thing, but just being a loser, not so good a thing." George
"I have had my ass beaten by bigger baboons than you." Mason
"There's no future for a man that can't hold his grog." Deloris Herbig
”I’ve got a theory, it could be bunnies.” Anya
-Everything
you ever wanted to know about Nick Lea. (Krycek)...Very
up to date! 
-Vince Gilligan
